Country Walk

Based on North Macedonia 2021
Vasil — Here I Stand

Urban life surrounded by tarmac
Grim outlook on cars and grey smokestacks
Twelve hours a day working from home
Existence in monochrome

And so armed with our phones to guide us
And printed out instructions
We had planned a lovely day
Our country walk
The perfect blend
Hour out of town, joined by closest friends
Flatmate Ellie
And my co-worker Tim, his gay friend Jack
Genial atmosphere

(Oh no)

No one mentioned blisters (Very painful)
Or Tim’s unpleasant sisters (Go away!)
Cheeks are stabbed by driving rain (Moistened trousers start to chafe)
(Ew cow pat!)
Nervous breakdown. Adrift in moorlands
(Ellie has betrayed us – we got lost)
(She failed to navigate us – where’d Jack go?)
(Jesus Christ we’ve lost the gay!)

There are times I lie awake at night
And all I see is stiles
And sheep poo

(Socks still stained with grey pus)
(Head torches were superfluous)
(So sorry – I’ve plans next Sunday)