Based on United Kingdom 1993
Sonia — Better the Devil You Know
Wordle, wordle
Yeah yeah yeah
Wordle, wordle
Yeah yeah yeah
Baby, you know that I’d never wear blue
Purple colours I always do
Oh God, don’t lose this, it makes me cry
I’m annihilated every night
Hung, drawn and quartered, every day
Torn to fibres, it’s not okay
Better the wordle you solve than the wordle you don’t
Uh huh, uh huh
If you do it in three, I’ll be saved from above
Please use the O
I won’t be torn apart - if the wordle you solve
Get ripped apart too much, come what may
Flung into tar pits, turned to macramé
Sandpapered down to ectoplasm goo
Such evil demises, couldn’t do it to you
Please do just solve it – I’ll even pay
I’ve no heart to break: it’s already sautéed
Better the wordle you solve than the wordle you don’t
Uh huh, uh huh
Kill sister Tonia first if you’re losin’, my love
She’s mean, Ton’s mean
My purple jumpsuit
For thirty years
Had not been stained, now
It’s full of blood and tears
Solving the wordle!
SOLVING the wordle!
Done being mashed up, stamped ‘pon and spat out? So’s our Son’
[Happy dance]
Do do do do doooo dooo
Wordle’s solved! And my purple’s intact
Evil Tonia’s dead, not before she self-shat!
[Jubilant dance]
Better the wordle you solve than the wordle you don’t
Sonia survived!
Käärijä: nothing but a useless cow pat
Got crushed: so green
BETTER THE WORDLE YOU SOLVE THAN THE WORDLE YOU DON’T!
Okay, we’re scared
If it’s purple and black: Zarra is where it’s at!
To turn to mush
Whoo!
Daily wordle – better make a call
Or I’ll come for you all
[Fade out to backing singers. All have terrified rictus grins]