DONG

Based on Austria 2023
Teya & Salena — Who the Hell Is Edgar?

Oh my God, your essay’s just flawless!
Well, I used DONG for most parts
You used what? Excuse me?

There’s a tool I’ve created – I’ve released it almost free
It’s the future of AI, so forget ChatGPT
The Device, that’s yet to brand, uses Open Neural Glan(d)s
Mh-mh

If you need a fine discourse, just resort to this machine
Throw some keywords in and press “Go!” – the result is on the screen
Yeah, its output is top-notch, it’s impossible to botch
Mh-mh

What’s this spectre? My text bursts with connectors!
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

So, so, so, so, so
For, for, for, for, for
Though, though, though, though, though
Notwithstanding, notwithstanding
So, so, so, so, so
For, for, for, for, for
Though, though, though, though, though
Likewise, furthermore

If you want to talk with strangers but don’t know their tongue
Get your smartphone near your mouth and speak your words,
translation’s done by DONG (¡yay!)
Have you maybe been hit on by a clown?
Look at all these options you can use to turn him down!

Non, non, non, non, non
Lo, lo, lo, lo, lo
Jo, jo, jo, jo, jo
Tidak, oxi, tidak, oxi
Non, non, non, non, non
Lo, lo, lo, lo, lo
Jo, jo, jo, jo, jo
Tidak, oxi

Where’s that funny voice from?

(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
What’s this devil?
(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
My speech reached a new level!
(Use your package, use your package)
(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
What’s this phantom?
(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
Got new skills I can’t fathom!
(Start an intercourse)

CSD, how can I assist?
Please hold one sec, there’s no need to be so pissed
I'll put you on the mailing list
You’ll know when these bugs are all fixed
I’m aware of my mission
Now all texts seem suspicious
Plus the voice recognition’s meh
And no, it can’t deal with “accents”
Duh!

(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
What’s this protest? (Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)
(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
These demands leave me so stressed!
(Not that perfect, not that perfect)
(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
What’s this nightmare? (Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)
(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
It will work smoothly, I swear!
(So deceitful, so deceitful)

(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
What’s this threat note? (Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)
(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
I submitted a fair quote!
(Give their fees back, give their fees back)
(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
What’s this siren? (Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)
(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
Please use DONG for my chyron!
(What a scandal, what a scandal)

What’s this sentence? I will show no repentance
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
It’s just for the name, dork!