Based on Netherlands 1990
Maywood — Ik wil alles met je delen
I was not the only one
To hurry to the mall
When it comes to global pandemics
There is no protocol
I mentally prepared myself
For what’s ‘bout to come
It is everyone for themselves
Once the game is on
I want ev’ry piece of paper
All of it shall be mine
That way I’ll be able to pee
Until the end of time
Food is deemed important
Water even more
Yet they can’t win against
Toilet paper rolls
The queue must have come straight from hell
It’s hard to path a way
When the whole world
Seems determined to
Fill a million crates
Corridor with number three
Where I need to be
But an empty wall is all I see
Nothing left for me
They took ev’ry piece of paper!
How selfish can you be
Though it’s hard to really fathom
I’m switching to Plan B
There’s no need to panic
I’ve been there before
So I made a call that
Put me in control
All of my friends like
To make fun of me
But at least, I can wee
That is guaranteed
What if you’re in isolation
And all out of TP
I have the solution
In hours they defrost
Keep them in the freezer
Ice-cold toilet rolls