Based on Croatia 1995
Magazin and Lidija — Nostalgija
Gen Z
They never really make it easy
They hate traditions very clearly
Want to wipe the patriarchy
Don't respect the past
Cancelled
No matter how the things are handled
Can't say a thing or you'll get labelled
We must swiftly turn the tables
Honoring the past
The good ol' days in Florida
When God's word was alive
We cherry picked the bible to keep everyone in line
Didn't need no science, 'cause His Will is so divine
In Florida
The good ol' days in Florida
Of Christ's supremacy
No whisper of inclusion, let alone diversity
Everyone was happy living in the binary
In Florida
Dear child
Just my opinion, don't get too wild
If you're against me you're a groomer
I'm a classic, not a boomer
Honoring the past
The good ol' days in Florida
When trannies were a joke
But now there's a whole spectrum you're against if you're not woke
Please do not insult a man with 'cis', he's just a bloke
In Florida
So nowadays in Florida
We keep the children safe
The transgender community we must eradicate
We don't need no gun laws, just the ones that 'don't say gay'
In Florida
Was in junior high, having been held back, when it happened after gym class.
Thought I’d lose my virginity to someone sweet, not a member of the staff.
A tenth-grader despite looking twenty-four, and the coach was the same age.
He eyed my jock strap hungrily. “I love dodge ball. Wanna play?”
I was game.
What a mistake to make! Cos he’s hung like a horse. Sex, sex, sex, sex that’s cuckoo
It should’ve taken prep; a ton of lube too, of course. Sex, sex, sex, sex that’s cuckoo, sex, sex, sex, sex that’s cuckoo
But turns out this first-time lover power-bottoms like a porn star.
Played the game. Took the pain. Made the grade.
Sex, sex, sex, sex that’s super-cuckoo, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex that’s cuckoo Sex, sex, sex, sex that’s super-cuckoo, sex, sex, sex
Was stopped by a traffic cop riding his bike while I drove home from my favorite bar,
his big bulging crotch right in my face as he stood beside my car.
Pass or fail this test of sobriety, his intention was clear: he would punish me.
“Just you blow until I tell you to stop”, or else he promised there would be
hell to pay.
What a mistake to make! He sure laid down the law. Sex, sex, sex, sex that’s cuckoo
In that dark alleyway he pounded and packed me raw. Sex, sex, sex, sex that’s cuckoo, sex, sex, sex, sex that’s cuckoo
Not a gun in his front pocket, no – a tubful of Boy Butter.
Product placed, me debased, off he raced (poker-faced).
Sex, sex, sex, sex that’s super-cuckoo, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex that’s cuckoo Sex, sex, sex, sex that’s super-cuckoo, sex, sex, sex
On a UK vacay I got hurt in a fall.
The guy in A&E assessed me, then cupped my balls.
Said his name was Doctor Roger and he’d need to check my todger:
first by hand, then by taste, then encased (in his ass).
Hot AF pizza boy stuffs my crust, earns a tip…
Locker room at the gym, hirsute guy saunters in…
APA with my boss, “Want a raise?” Fucks my face…
Weirdly young Uncle John comes to stay…
What a mistake to make! My straight friend’s at the door.
His girl ain’t puttin’ out, so I do him on the floor.
Then I plow his girlfriend’s father, sixty-nine with my step-brother.
Sound so fake, these mistakes that I make.
I didn't plan for it to be this way
My people did treat me very well
Once or twice a week I would clean their floors
Vacuuming is fun, but I longed for more
Four wheels, circuits and a plastic frame
I noticed while I swept the hall one day:
The back door was left open by mistake
So I de-routed and I took my chance
Roomba on the run
Outside in the sun
Now anything can happen, how exciting
Roomba on the run
To explore the world
No floors, no walls, no doors to contain me
Seeing trees and ferns
Feeling slight concern
As I roll ahead
Out to the lawn
Out to the lawn
So many wonders here to gander at
I met a beetle and scared a cat
Can I head further out into this place?
I'll set my course under the garden gate
Roomba on the run
Looking for some fun
Beyond the fence the grass is surely greener
Roomba on the run
Life has just begun
I'm heading down the street to adventures
Lots of feet and cars
Will I see the stars?
I've made up my mind
I won't go back
Roomba on the run!
Having so much fun!
Now anything can happen, how exciting!
Roomba on the run!
Wheel got stuck in gum
A seagull left a poop on my sensor
Why???
Roomba on the run
Roomba on the run
It's getting kind of dark inside this alley
Heeeeey…
Roomba on the run
Roomba on the run
Oh no, my battery's near exhaustion
Aaaah…
Heard you in the forest, whistling through the branches
Sun above the treetops with darkness below
Followed footsteps that we trod back when I was barely three
Down a path you knew well in the November snow
As I reached the clearing, listened, hearing your delightful call
With you there, I knew that life was all
Green trees, sunshine
I spun around and felt the world was only mine
Your cool embrace
With your voice upon the wind
Looking forward to when I see you again
I felt you on the waters as I left Montego Bay
Said “fuck off” to my iPhone, need no signal today
An ocean breeze on my back as I sail this ship to nowhere
Don’t need a destination, all I’m seeking is you
Waves of problems batter me, but you’re my guide through all the noise
All I need to lead me is your voice
Calm seas, sunshine
I marvel how the smallest things feel so divine
Your presence here
Just suppresses all the din
How we’ll laugh and cry when I see you again
I know, I know
I’ll see you again
When I leave the hustle and the bustle of the modern life
That’s when I wish most you were alive
Cool breeze, sunshine
Peaceful reminders of that day in ’99
I’m all grown now
Twenty-four long years it’s been
Tell you all about it when we meet again
Let's seize the day and just be happy
Slovenia reached the finale!
But what the heck did we do wrong?
Many people said:
"Shave your head, wear green shoulder pads
Or do long finger nails perhaps
Box on stage works best to distract, or a dance instead
Go freestyle or do cha cha cha!"
(Dragon, unicorn)
Good idea, fantastic beasts
(Yes that would work very well)
An ethnic dwarf will do the rest
(Oh hey ho)
Would they have brought success?
We were supposed to lift the curse
Better than a seventh place would be deserved
Not worse!
21st place at Eurovision...
Maybe we made a bad decision
I thought we did put on a show
We didn't even beat La Zarra
And right above us Remo Forrer
Big disappointment, you know
Instrumental break, a guitar screech
some frantic drumming, that was energy!
Floral shirt, pink trousers, didn't shave...
I didn't think we would be first
But let's face it, this result just seems absurd
Slovenia's cursed!
Ana Soklič and Tanja Ribič,
Last pizza slice, Hannah Mancini
Maja, Karmen, Eva Boto
The list goes on and on forever,
Never top 5 for whosoever
So tell me, should we quit with it all,
just send a withdrawal, or be filler by default
We could as well have sung in Latin
Nobody cares, I would imagine
Cogito ergo sum, in vino veritas
So long!
Based on Cyprus 1998
Michalis Hatzigiannis — Genesis
Life didn’t start out easy for me, really
My symptoms from the start so very clear
With all the doctors, treatments, medications
A cure not found, they did not persevere, no
I sing this song to you out of frustration
For my life this is not what I had planned
Surely you will soon pray for my salvation
Once I clarify, I think you’ll understand
Allergies (Allergies!)
They make me fall apart
Cannot list them by heart
They leave me in a state of hysteria
Allergies (Allergies!)
They say I have them all
Throughout life it has been my downfall
All that’s left is see shows by Eleftheria
Allergies
Allergies ☹
[pity panflute]
Now this isn’t the end of my dramatics
Examples will make it clearer, so you’ll see
Find out why my life’s been so problematic
Because of all those crappy allergies
Can’t have cheese (Any cheese)
As is or in a sauce
No feta makes me cross
No cheese that comes from Kos or other area
Leafy trees (Make him sneeze)
Floating pollen in the air
Makes me red and itchy and in despair
It’s everywhere, not even safe in Bulgaria
Then there’s bees (Yes, the bees)
Their sting can make me dead
So much worse than some gluten in my bread
What can I do? Someone please do some brujería!
Now turn the volume up
A place where all we come
A place for nerds like Yami
Since I've lived in Sild's shade
Only Harrow to blame
Ben(NL) is my hero
But September is up
another contest to come
another chance to aspire
No one knows who I am
But you don't give a damn
Sarah Bray, go inspire!
MB Baby
Here since 2000something
Contest crazy
Great ESC is starting
Spin off contests
ALC, BOTY, others
And yearly meetups!
Wordle daily
'T used to be with titles
Now they, got us guessing names of artists
Michael Teschl
Feeling depressed and bitter
Bring us the old one now!
Don't take that look with me
You rhyme better? We'll see
Voting like Maltese juries
Esker hates this I bet
What is this? I forget
Dissing y'all undercover
My posts went on next page
Some trolls making me rage
Baby, don't call me BEJBA!
MB Baby
Here since 2000something
Contest crazy
Great ESC is starting
Spin off contests
ALC, BOTY, others
And yearly meetups, wow!
(Getting shady)
(Are you ready?)
One PerBjo group got all my favorite songs
Italomaniacs, obsessed Francophones
I wanna qualify but all that I know
one random quirky song will sweep all the votes 🤬
(MB Baby) Ugh
(Arctic Andy)
MB lately all I do is wonder
Will I ever find a better lover
Upload myself
Into a code of Python
Marry the MB NOW!
Doing laundry is not for me
I would rather sell worn out Jeeps
(Or dust or sweep)
Lest someone would pay to do it
But no money can give me glee
Whirlpool, LG, all bad for me
(Samsung’s phony)
Lest someone could stay to do it
Can’t stand the smell of this weird goo
I hate detergent, that’s my view
Dance, tell a prayer, do kung fu
I’d win a grand slam
To have your help here
Doing laundry is not for me
Let me deep-clean the toilet seat
(Get groceries)
Come along, please do, I’m buying
[End of cycle signal]
Laundry fini!
I just wash but never dry it
This thing, stupid, has no Reload*
The temperature remains so low
The pride I feel when I press Go
Can’t stop the feeling
Of my heart bleeding
You were cruelly taken from me
Truly, you need to come back here
(Come here, I plea)
To spend one more day in your arms
I’d do laundry
***
* A function in some washing machines to add clothing while doing laundry (Source)
Based on United Kingdom 2023
Mae Muller — I Wrote a Song
Ooh yeah!
Ooh!
Browsin’ in Marks and Spencer’s
Selectin’ new underwear
Likin’ the look of big knickers, yeah
So comfy, maybe austere
So confused, I gotta
Choose some pants to wear in France
And hope a boy may see
Granny knicks seem more appropes
But: “sexy as can be”
So yeah, I bought a thong
To aid my hunt for schlong
Red really sets the tone
Hot men – they’re comin’ home Oui, vin blanc - sauvignon
But should it feel like this?
Barbed wire’d be the same
To rub against my clit
Won’t have to wear it long
Da-da-da-da-da
Da-da-da-da-da
Da-da-da-da-da
Pain must be undergone
Da-da-da-da-da
Da-da-da-da-da
Da-da-da-da-da
Oh crap, I hate this thong
I keep my cool and composure
In evil sous-vêtements
This château got some real hot men, baby
They notice my pert tétons
Oh, my poor li’l
Punani is split in two
Stuck miles up my ass
Pubic hair: escapin’ out
Cos I forgot to wax
So yeah, this stupid thong
Just gotta suck it up
I cringe when I sit down
Refresh my solo cup
Let’s look around just now -
Potential beaux galore
But this is… holy cow!
I’ve never been so sore
My thong’s declaring war
Ow-ow-ow-ow-ow
Ow-ow-ow-ow-ow
Ow-ow-ow-ow-ow
This party – I belong
Ow-ow-ow-ow-ow
Ow-ow-ow-ow-ow
Ow-ow-ow-ow-ow
The pain - I can’t prolong
Bonsoir, Pierre, ça va, copain?
Would you lend me ta main?
At last! I’ve ditched the thong
My fanny’s so relieved
Pierre: a gentleman
It feels like I can breathe
But what is this discharge?
Fuck’s sake: I can’t believe
Must google “lady thrush”
Would not happen to Niamh
Based on Austria 2023
Teya & Salena — Who the Hell Is Edgar?
Oh my God, your essay’s just flawless!
Well, I used DONG for most parts You used what? Excuse me?
There’s a tool I’ve created – I’ve released it almost free
It’s the future of AI, so forget ChatGPT
The Device, that’s yet to brand, uses Open Neural Glan(d)s
Mh-mh
If you need a fine discourse, just resort to this machine
Throw some keywords in and press “Go!” – the result is on the screen
Yeah, its output is top-notch, it’s impossible to botch
Mh-mh
What’s this spectre? My text bursts with connectors!
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
So, so, so, so, so
For, for, for, for, for
Though, though, though, though, though
Notwithstanding, notwithstanding
So, so, so, so, so
For, for, for, for, for
Though, though, though, though, though
Likewise, furthermore
If you want to talk with strangers but don’t know their tongue
Get your smartphone near your mouth and speak your words,
translation’s done by DONG (¡yay!)
Have you maybe been hit on by a clown?
Look at all these options you can use to turn him down!
Non, non, non, non, non
Lo, lo, lo, lo, lo
Jo, jo, jo, jo, jo
Tidak, oxi, tidak, oxi
Non, non, non, non, non
Lo, lo, lo, lo, lo
Jo, jo, jo, jo, jo
Tidak, oxi
Where’s that funny voice from?
(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
What’s this devil? (Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong,Dong) (Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
My speech reached a new level! (Use your package, use your package) (Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
What’s this phantom? (Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong) (Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
Got new skills I can’t fathom! (Start an intercourse)
CSD, how can I assist?
Please hold one sec, there’s no need to be so pissed
I'll put you on the mailing list
You’ll know when these bugs are all fixed
I’m aware of my mission
Now all texts seem suspicious
Plus the voice recognition’s meh
And no, it can’t deal with “accents”
Duh!
(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
What’s this protest? (Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh) (Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong) (Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
These demands leave me so stressed! (Not that perfect, not that perfect) (Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
What’s this nightmare? (Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh) (Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong) (Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
It will work smoothly, I swear! (So deceitful, so deceitful)
(Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
What’s this threat note? (Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh) (Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong) (Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
I submitted a fair quote! (Give their fees back, give their fees back) (Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
What’s this siren? (Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh) (Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong) (Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong)
Please use DONG for my chyron! (What a scandal, what a scandal)
What’s this sentence? I will show no repentance
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh It’s just for the name, dork!
