Based on Macedonia 2007
Karolina — Mojot svet
{Cat Chorus}
{Meowing, translated as follows}
“Why have one man when you can have nine cats?”
“Finer companions you could not have”
“Though you shouldn’t tease a three-legged cat”
“That would be a major faux paw”
Menopause calls me
I’m feeling fat
No one consoles me
Can’t live with that
Deep inside me
There’s this hole
That needs some filling up fast
I had better get a pussy cat
Feline fulfilment is where it’s at
Be it pure-bred or a moggie
Any pussy I’ll have that
{Karolina adopts a random stray}
Living with my little pookie cat
Purring serenely upon my lap
All night long I
Stroke my pussy
Sometimes too I
Pet my cat
{Cat jumps away}
{Giving Karolina the stink eye}
{Writhing seductively}
{Karolina grabs her pussy}
I love your beauty:
You’d win awards
Would dogs describe it
“Cat-has-trophe”?
{Pussy thrusts and wriggles, escaping Karolina’s grasp}
{and her dreadful sense of humour}
Come back, RuPaw
{Dashes through cat flap}
{the cat, not Karolina}
Don’t Go! Oh, well
Fetch moggie:
Need pussy now
{Karolina visits a cat rescue shelter*}
{*a.k.a. The Pied-Piper-of-Pussy section of this AL}
Hello lovely little kitty cats
Come with me I’ve got the purrrfect place
Filled with toys and treats a plenty
Where we’ll do the Nya Nya Dance
Don’t mind whether you’re an alley cat
Domestic shorthair or Cornish Rex
There are pleasures in my flat like
Erect poles to rub against
{Cats, though suspicious, follow her home}
{Knowing they’re on to a good thing}
{months pass}
{Karolina continuing her cat seduction ways}
Meow meow meow meow
{Untranslatable*}
Meow me-ow meow meow
{*Nah - just kitten}
“She was normal three cats ago”
“Why’dya think we sit on your keyboard?”
“Keeping an eye on the... Mouse!”
{more months pass}
{Largely to recover from that dreadful pun}
Now I live with fifty pussy cats
Hairballs, pesky fleas I sure get scratched
Yet the lesson they have taught me:
Every cat’s love is for life
When I’m dead they’ll eat my body
After all, yes, cats are cats!