Based on Switzerland 1956
Lys Assia — Das alte Karusell
Lys Assia's in Hell
Don't ask why, I can't tell
She runs, with Terry Wogan,
The ESC hotel
The afterlife's protean
Don't know which room you'll be in
Depends on the behaviour
You showed as human beings
After you leave the mortal coil
and face your ordinance
If bad outweighs your most good deeds
You won't go to the clouds
You'll check in there instead
They'll make for you a bed
Your soul will then be dragged in
To your eternal cell
You must Stay Forever
Turndown? No, No Never
And you'll sleep on a pillow of Stones
The service Rock Bottom
Cig stains on the carpet
And the smoke alarm's Gordienko
You will not sleep so well
As outside the fires swell
But even attempting to draw pyro curtains
Surely won't have a pleasant outcome
Be sure that Hotel Hell
Is no good place to dwell
Be good and get to Heaven
To check in with D'Mol
Lys Assia's in Hell
Youuuuuu
Could end up there as well