Based on Luxembourg 2025
Laura Thorn — La poupée monte le son
Proudly your sixth favourite Yugoslav nation
Boring towns, one fjord, and musical sensations
Come to Podgorica for our celebration
Montesong! Montesong!
RTCG come on!
We’ll just rig the jury vote for Nina Žižić
Surely twelve points translates to the same in Danish
Even though the song could just be Breathe from Wish
What? Dva Srca? Baryak?
Those singers don’t connect
Ratings don’t look so hot
Phone vote turnout has dropped
But who cares no straight man is going to watch
Our Bond-theme knock-off
Emmelie? Oh fuck off!
What have you done?
This poopy Montesong
Vladana! Vladana!
Where did it all go wrong?
Don’t blame Dolce Hera
At poopy Montesong
From Niksic to Budva
No-one knew it was on
Clickbait was the winner
A poopy Monte-
Miss Vučinić’s mind turned to her revenge
Four hundred and forty three viewers offend
Punishment so dire you cannot comprehend
Giardia! Nausea! Parasitical hell
Reservoirs transformed to be like a latrine
Water quality worse than you’ve ever seen
Streptococcus flowing through Durmitor streams
One mad woman. Heinous plan
Poisoned the nation’s well
Sure she’s over the top
Strained by her Turin flop
Who could ever foresee this plumbing plot
Look at what she’s done
Montenegrins all sweat and clench their bums
A poopy Montesong
Gastrointestinal
Sphincter control has gone
Please wear a bin liner
That poopy Montesong
Poofly infestation
All thoughts turn to marron
Loose bowel occasion
The poopy Montesong
Neonoen feel unwell
Đurđa’s gut is a fuel cell
Bend 9 are curled up as well
Shigella?
Things about to get nasty
Hope you choke on poopity
Eurocolonoscopy
Just eat my…
Just eat my…
Just eat my shit…
A poopy Montesong