To Serve Man

Based on Denmark 2019

Soon after World War Three,
We ran out of tinned sardines.
Coping with hunger, we
Developed new food routines.

Tree bark went down rough, did not fill us enough,
And was not nutritional.
Tried to make some fudge from cockroaches and sludge,
But it was unbearable.

We were survivors,
(Who)’d survived two nuclear wars.
Then came two hikers,
(Who)’d turn us back into carnivores.
Just a taste of Tom, a taste of Matt,
Could fill us up, thank god they’re fat.
They’re better than a can of SPAM,
So we won’t ever go back to those cans.

Devoured a dead farmhand,
With Chinese Five Finger Blend.
Imagine preparing stew,
Garnished with bits of Stu.

Maybe it’s not right, but food was kinda tight.
It’s apocalyptical.
So who are you to judge, who we have had for lunch?
Tony makes a great meatball!

We are survivors,
(Who)’ve invented a new gourmet store.
We welcome shoppers,
(Who)’ve got a taste for backpackers.
Have a taste of John, a taste of Brett,
A wino drowned in vinaigrette,
Fresh hobos cooked up on the spot.
So come on down and don’t you mind the blood.

A wandering gypsy queen,
Could be your to-go cuisine.
Bring in all your dead amis,
And we’ll cook them up for free.

Do you think it’s gross? Eating all your bros?
Think that it’s against the law?
Cannibals are not such a pleasant thought?
Cannibals should be locked up?

Then look at it this way.
Then look at it this way, what else could we do?
We look at it this way.
We look at it this way, we think you should too:
Just a taste of Bob, a taste of Steve
Because the bombs destroyed our beef.
It’s sensible, and if it’s not,
It beats becoming vegetarian.