Based on Íris Holm — Leyndarmál (Iceland NF 2012)
Come here we’ve a choice to make. Helsinki in May, our Irish entry
Looking at results to date. Weakness was the song, televotes thin
How ‘bout an open call? Does that sound ok then?
“You berk! Your options are all wrong
We’ll have a one artist final
WITH DERVISH! Trad and folk, nothing can go wrong”
Seems as though the bodhráns failed. Yes four tones out of tune, a minor mistake
Never mind lessons were learned. We’ll turn this around. Emphasis changed
Focus on songs this time? Have a proper final?
“Good guess. We’ll have five different songs
But then let’s add a twist on top
A PANEL! To guide voters to something bland”
With Louis, Billy, and Linda. Sure there's no scandals there
(Sound mix inflicts) true hell on all eardrums everywhere
Is it that hard?
“It’s clear. We’re missing something fun
ADD MENTORS! You know nepotism is hot”
Who cares? Just call Sammy Mumba
Her ballads are so bad
And her chair belongs in Andorra
RTE please could you just pick a nice song